AEM Podcast #78 Marcus Gottlieb – Sexuality in Boarding Schools/ Working With Gay Boarding School Survivors

An Evolving Man Podcast (AEM) #78

Marcus Gottlieb – Sexuality in Boarding Schools/ Working With Gay Boarding School Survivors

Today I am speaking with Marcus Gottlieb about sexuality in boarding schools. He talks about his experience of working with gay, lesbian and bisexual ex-boarders.


He also talks about how boarding school was like “a penal colony on Mars” for him. He talks about fagging, being given sedatives as a home sickness medicine, what boarding school syndrome is and how it impacts adults.


A really fascinating conversation where I learned so much about sexuality in boarding schools.


I also share my own experiences of sexuality in my own boarding school.


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Marcus Gottlieb is an experienced psychotherapist of humanistic and integrative orientation. He is registered with the UK Council for Psychotherapy and accredited by the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy. One half of his practice is supporting boarding school survivors.


Questions for Marcus:


  1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
  2. Could you please talk about boarding school syndrome. What is it and how does it impact adults?
  3. How was your boarding school experience like?
  4. Boarding schools claim to instil 'character', self-confidence and self-reliance. Do you agree? What is your clinical experience?
  5. What are some of the symptoms of boarding school syndrome as an adult?
  6. Could you talk about the impact of sexuality in a boarding school setting?
  7. How does boarding school impact us sexually, especially if we are gay, lesbian or bisexual? “...all experienced their schools as profoundly homophobic environments.” P.20
  8. Why is it difficult for gay men and women to come to terms with their boarding school experience?
  9. Other areas to talk about:
  10. The double bind
  11. How the body restricts itself – throat, chest
  12. Denying and ignoring the needs of the body
  13. If our leaders who have attended BS have denied and ignored their own needs how might that manifest when they are looking after a whole country?
  14. Timetabling
  15. The lack of privacy
  16. BS seem to “produce compliant conformists and sabotaging rebels.”
  17. “repressive, austere, joyless institutions from which everything tactile, sensual or voluptuous was deliberately excluded.” P.20


To reach out to Marcus or learn more about his work please visit either: https://nottinghilltherapy.co.uk/


Or: https://www.bodyinmind.london/


Or the website: https://boardingrecovery.com/



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